Chapter 18

The plan was simple.  Alastor would challenge Valentino, as the new man in charge of the Vees, to a poker game.  They would wager their top soul contracts, Alastor’s complete ownership over the former overlord Husk’s soul, for Valentino’s ‘employment’ contract over his most valuable ‘employee’ Angel Dust.

Of course, it took some finagling to get Valentino to agree.  Angel would join the game on behalf of Val and Husk would play on behalf of Alastor.  Meaning if either Valentino or Angel won the game, Valentino would retain Angel’s contract AND gain complete ownership over Husk’s soul.  However, if Alastor or Husk won the game, Alastor would retain ownership of Husk AND acquire Angel Dust’s ‘employment’ contract from Val.

Valentino’s little robo-fizzi would act as an impartial animatronic dealer.  No magic.  No cheating.  A binding deal was struck insuring neither could break or back out the terms, at least not without a clever loophole.  Thus, the game was played fair and square…for the most part.

Husk was first to be felted, as Alastor had anticipated.  Husk had been far too emotional to keep a level head about him.  Alastor wasn’t concerned.  The deal stipulated no cheating, but there had been no mention of counting cards, a skill at which Alastor was quite adept.  Although frowned upon in casinos, counting cards was not considered cheating, particular in poker which is a skill-based game against other players.

It didn’t take long for Valentino to be swindled out of all his chips and bust due to his own overconfidence.  That left Angel and Alastor.  By now both had realized the other was rather observant and talented when it came to poker.  Angel had also become wise to the plan, and Alastor recognized the moment it clicked for Angel.  Honestly considering the drugs Valentino kept in Angel’s system Alastor hadn’t really expected him to be much help to himself at all, but it certainly made for a more amusing game.

The moment Valentino had lost his last hand he had started hovering over Angel, threatening him not to dare lose on purpose. Not that he could as that would be considered cheating.  Alastor had been pleasantly surprised to see that despite all this, Angel had been able to pick up on and follow Alastor’s silent communication rather well.  Really his ability to play as a sort of partner in a game of cards was rather astonishing.  Alastor mused to himself that perhaps once the spider is clean and sober again he’d make for an adequate partner in a game of Hearts or Spades, possibly even bridge if the rest of the hotel staff could ever be properly taught.

With their silent cooperation going entirely unnoticed by Valentino, and even Husk, who had been watching intently and holding his breath since his defeat, Angel watched for signs from Alastor that told him when to fold, when to call, or even when to raise.  They had to make it look good, didn’t they?  As such, Angel won enough hands to appear to be giving it his all, but his chips were slowly dwindling.  Often enough neither he or Alastor had to bother with making any decisions with Valentino ordering Angel to call or raise whenever his hand appeared unbeatable.

More than once already it was Valentino who caused Angel to lose his hand to a chance river card.  You’d think the guy would have learned his lesson, but once a putz always a putz.  Eventually the continual slight shrinking of Angel’s chips had Valentino giving into frustration and irrational behavior.  Until finally when he saw Angel held a king and a queen as his two private cards with one of the flop cards being another king giving him pair of two kings and a queen.  He ordered Angel to raise, obviously failing to consider there are a number of hands that could easily beat even a pair kings.  How foolish.

Angel, of course, obliged.  Who was he to argue with Valentino?  Even if he did know that Alastor likely held the winning hand.  It all came down to the river card once again.  The river card revealed a queen.  Angel now had a pair of kings and a pair of queens, but he knew that was hardly anything really.  Valentino, however, being the overconfident and under educated schmuck that he was insisted Angel to go all in.  Bad move.  Alastor’s two hold cards had been the other two queens.  This gave him three of kind easily beating Angel’s two pair.

Somehow it seemed fitting that Valentino had lost the game to three queens.  Still, even a fool knows any three of a kind would beat two pair.  Val was furious, but he could rage, threaten, and throw however many tantrums he wanted.  It didn’t matter anymore.  It all seemed surreal in Angel’s drugged and defeated state.  He felt nothing.  His ill-tempered idiot of a boss had just gambled his soul contract in a poker game only to lose in such an obvious rookie way and was now throwing a violent tantrum, yet Angel felt nothing.  He was just so exhausted he couldn’t even process that he now officially belonged to Alastor, The Radio Demon.

All Angel could do was replay the game, especially that last hand, in his mind as his consciousness drifted from him.  The fight or flight had finally left him and crashed his nervous system all together.  The last thing he consciously registered before he succumbed to the fatigue was Husk calling his name before he was blanketed in cool darkness.

Alastor’s shadows had encased his newly acquired employee and deposited him safely into Husk’s awaiting arms before he could hit the floor.  “Hmmm, it seems he’s had enough excitement for one night. He played quite a game, though, I must say! Let’s get him back then shall we?”

“YOU’RE NOT FUCKING TAKING HIM ANYWHERE! HE’S MINE!”  Valentino attempted to attack Husk and retrieve Angel Dust, but Alastor intercepted him.

“Ah ah ah, I won him fair and square. We made a deal, remember? You felt it yourself, didn’t you? His soul chain and contract transferred from your ownership to mine the moment the last hands were revealed. Now then, I’m afraid our friendly little match took much longer than I had anticipated. Your man played very well. Or should I say, my man. I’ll be leaving with him now. It’s late and I do want my new employee well rested and ready to work for me.”

That brought the reality of the situation down upon Husk.  He had been so relieved to have Angel in his arms and be taking him back to the hotel that he had forgotten it was only happening because Alastor now owned his soul.  “What do you plan to do with him, Boss?”

“Oh, don’t worry your fuzzy little head about it. For now, let’s just get him back to the hotel. I’m sure our regal barkeep has either dozed off on the job or abandoned his post completely by now. It’s so hard to find good help these days. Ha! Let’s hope my latest recruit proves to be useful.”  With that Alastor gave one last wicked sneer to Valentino who was still seething, but unable to do much else about the situation.  Alastor had no doubts, given the eccentric behavior of the angry creep and his known persistently problematic affiliates, he wasn’t just going to let this go.  He was likely already thinking of ways to try and reclaim the spider, but he’d worry about that later.  It’s nothing he can’t handle, after all.

The Vees were less of a concern to Alastor than leaving Lucifer alone for any serious length of time.  It was now just past the witching hour and, even in Hell, that seemed to be when ill intentioned pests like to crop up.  This night had gone far too smoothly thus far and if Alastor had learned anything in all his time here, it was that things didn’t remain smooth for long.

Back at the hotel Lucifer was beginning to worry.  Not for Alastor, of course, why would anyone worry about him?  He could take care of himself.  Charlie’s friends, though, were important to her and she had been extremely distraught over losing one during their battle with Adam.  Lucifer just didn’t want his daughter to be upset again.  He was absolutely NOT worried about Alastor.

“Don’t worry. Alastor is a really bad boy. He’ll come back safe and sound.”  Nifty kicked her feet happily as she stared up at Lucifer from her bar stool.

Lucifer shrugged.  “Who’s worried? Not me. Especially not about that loud, obnoxious, overdressed, walking antenna! Psh.”  Nifty just cackled like a mad woman.  ‘Maybe she is mad. She does hang around with Alastor.’  That made Lucifer wonder.  “So, uh, what’s your relationship to that radio loser, anyway?”

“Curious?”

Nifty shot him a grin that could match Alastor’s.  However, before he could rebuke her accusation another voice interrupted them from the lobby.  Lucifer hadn’t even noticed the group of sinners until they started heckling him.

“Man, I knew he was pathetic from watching Vox put him in his place at his rally, but now they got him serving drinks at a hotel bar? C’mon!”

Another joined in, “I can’t believe people actually used to be afraid of him.”

And another, “I mean, he did have enough power to blast the gates off Heaven and kill, like, a whole shit ton of people.”

The first guy again, “So what? It’s not like HE can use that power. That was Vox’s doing. Vox USED him like some sort of holy ray gun or something.”

‘Uh oh’ Lucifer thought as he listened to the conversation between the new demons in the lobby.  ‘This could get bad. Is this the sort of thing Lilith, and even Alastor, had been concerned about?’

“You won’t have to deal with those guys, bad boy.”  Nifty whispered up to him.  “I know you CAN deal with them if you want to. You’re the ultimate bad boy.”  She giggled a bit eerily.  “I can’t let you play with those guys, though. Alastor told me to guard you, so I will.”

Lucifer found that strangely comforting, but still odd.  More importantly he really didn’t want to cause any trouble at all.  ‘Charlie would be upset if anyone at the hotel got hurt because of me. Because I really am, as Alastor had so frustratingly put it, sloppy with my secrets, this is why Lilith had to make a deal with that red whacky-inflatable-tube-guy looking jerk.  She knighted him just to fix my screw ups.  She’s still fixing my screw ups even after I let her go.’  She should be free of him and the burdens he causes.  They were divorced now, right?  Why was he still dragging her down?  No, not just her, but also Charlie, and, well, he hated to admit it, but even Alastor too.  ‘Speaking of my new supposed knight in tacky red armor, where is he anyway?’

Right on cue, like the performer he was, he appeared in the hotel lobby, both bartender and spider demon seemingly unharmed beside him.  “Apologies for my delay. I do hope all was well and quiet in my absence.”  Alastor shot the demons in the lobby a knowing look.

Lucifer noticed and felt unusually grateful, but he wasn’t about to admit it.

“Just some bad boys talking about the ultimate bad boy and his power. They’re really dumb, though.”  Nifty leaped onto Alastor and pointed at the demons while laughing.

“Is that so? Hmmm, you’re right, my dear, they really are quite foolish to talk about Hell’s King in his own daughter’s hotel. Especially after having been shown such gracious hospitality. What do you say, My King, should I take out the trash?”

Lucifer knew it was all a show.  It was just a carefully crafted performance to set an example for other residents of the hotel, but even so, something about the way Alastor addressed him, and his gentle movements as he did so just now, had made Lucifer’s breath hitch and brain short circuit.  ‘Were Alastor’s eyes always so…nope!’  Lucifer coughed, “they’re hardly worth it, but I suppose an example is in order. Just don’t go overboard and make too big of a mess.”  Lucifer tried to act bored and nonchalant about the whole ordeal, but deep down it had his blood warming with excitement like he hadn’t felt in ages.

“Oh, no worries. If I make a mess, our dear Nifty here will take care of it, won’t you, Darling?”

Nifty outright erupted into a fit maniacal laughter unlike anything Lucifer had heard from her all night.  She looked upon Alastor’s display with pure glee as he very quickly tore apart and devoured the three brazenly mouthy sinners that had dared to heckle their king.  “Hmph, good riddance.”  Lucifer said attempting to sound unbothered and uninterested as Husk plopped Angel down onto a bar stool and held him steady.  In truth, Lucifer had been too busy watching Alastor with nearly as much glee as the mad little maid to notice the other two were there.  “I suppose the mission was a success?”

“Oh yea! Huge success!”

“Angel! Don’t you get it? You just traded one master for another! I wouldn’t call that a ‘huge success’, more like the lesser of two evils.”  Husk was relieved to have Angel back and glad he had come to and seemed to be perking up, but he didn’t want Angel getting ahead of himself.  It was too early to celebrate.  Alastor now owned Angel.  Husk, in his desperation to bring Angel back, had practically given him to his boss himself.

“You can say that again! As far as evils go, Smiles over there is definitely the lesser of them.”

“Angel, don’t you get what I’m saying? You’re still…and I…I mean, I was the one who…”

“Husk, stop. I know what you’re gonna say, but don’t. I didn’t want anyone to rescue me. Still don’t. I made mistakes and I need to fix them on my own. At least my soul is in better hands than it was. I’ll still find a way to get it back, but for now isn’t better that ol’ tall dark and creepy has it instead of Val?”

Husk sighed.  Angel had a point.  Husk had once foolishly preached to him about their situations being equally shitty just because they’d both lost their souls to overlords.  He had since come to feel like a real ass after having learned that Angel’s situation had been far worse.  Alastor was an asshole when he wanted to be, but comparatively he really was the far better option.  “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Success.”

“Damn straight! Now help me up! I wanna go get cleaned up and find Cherri and Fat nuggets!”

“Not so fast, my newly acquired employee.”  Alastor practically sang as he approached.  Husk and Angel both groaned.

Lucifer darkened his scowl.  He was just starting to find this prick tolerable.  He was even starting to believe maybe the guy wasn’t so bad, after all.  ‘Couldn’t he let these guys have just a few hours of peace? He should have known an overlord would want to make use of his newly enslaved soul right away. The poor guy was barely even standing! This jerk!’

Alastor did his usual hands behind his back slight bend as he stared the porn star in his eyes.  “You work for me now. I have a reputation to maintain. Therefore, I’m afraid I cannot permit you to continue with your current occupation. So, tell me, what else can you do, my good man?”

“Uh…,” Angel wasn’t quite sure what was happening.  Was this like a job interview?  “I guess I can come in handy.”  He said with a cheeky smirk as he materialized his other set of arms.  In the back of his mind Angel already felt like he’d made a self-improvement by opting to make a pun of the word ‘handy’, rather than the word ‘come’ in that statement.  It seemed like his creepy but corny new boss approved.

Alastor found that little quip amusing.  “Ha! Good show! Well, for now, I suppose you may continue among the ranks of hotel staff. You will no longer ‘celebrity endorse’ the hotel, as you put it. Why, there’s really no need for that with higher quality celebrities such as myself and The King here. Instead, you will make yourself useful around here. Now that I think about it, we don’t actually HAVE a ‘bellhop’, do we? And with all the new guests I do believe we need one. You certainly have the hands for lending to luggage. You start first thing tomorrow!”

“Wait, but Alastor, it’s already four in the morning! Angel’s still outta it and needs some rest!”

“Tsk tsk, Husker, did I say today? I believe I said tomorrow.”

Husk, Angel, and Lucifer stared at him in bewilderment.  All of them wondering if this was Alastor being kind.

Alastor rolled his eyes at the overly sentimental looks the three were giving him.  “It’s not like anyone will be doing any work around here anyway once Charlie gets back and realizes her lost lamb has returned.”  He clicked his tongue.  This was getting a bit awkward with the trio staring at him like he was some sort of saint.

“You got it, Boss!”  Angel suddenly cheered and nearly fell over.  Husk put an arm around him and guided him away.

Alastor took a seat atop one of the bar stools.  Lucifer looked at him smugly, “so, what will it be?”  ‘Ha! I was right! There is a wee bit of good in this snarky showy brat.’

“You don’t have to keep at it, you know? This is usually when I take over anyway, not that you’d know that.”

“You take over the bar at four in the morning?”

“The bar? No. I watch over the hotel while everyone else sleeps. It would be foolish to leave this place unattended, especially with the demons and residents herein having collectively managed to piss off quite a lot of people.”

“Oh. I suppose that makes sense. Still, I’m surprised you get up so early.”

“Assuming I bother to sleep at all.”

“Creepy. Sooooo…coffee?”

“Coffee.”