Hey, did you hear the one about the puns?
No but I’m sure you will tell me about it
They were worse than sin according to the nuns
Not as bad as the jokes you tell, you old twit
Alright wise guy let’s hear you tell a good one
Not that you will understand, it I have wit
Shall we make this a contest then, just for fun?
Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is
You’re on, with the last laugh the game has been won
It’s a deal friend, I used to work in showbiz
Until you were replaced by that genius kid
Yes, I suppose you could have called him a wiz
I admit no one made me laugh like you did
Too bad it wasn’t for my jokes, but for my face
It’s true I have seen handsomer mugs on squid
But there are still some things you just can’t replace
Like the brain cells lost trying to get your bad jokes
I meant the one-liners delivered with grace
Like the one about the frog and the bad yolks
This won’t end well for him, I’d bet my last dime
Turns out if a frog eats rotten eggs he croaks
Sounds to me like he had a shell of a time
Nothing like a good egg joke to make us crack
I always say puns like that are just sublime
When it comes to corny jokes, we have a knack
Corny jokes you say, well speak for yourself old man
They really ought to give us some sort of plaque
Sounds to me like you might be our biggest fan
Now since when did this become a two man show
From the moment this so-called contest began
My jokes are superior, I’ll have you know
That’s also where they belong in the Great Lake
It seems in your old age you have gotten slow
I’m just getting started you corny old flake
First eggs, now cereal, has breakfast been served
Let’s just see how many cheesy jokes you make
Yes, you do quite like your cheese I have observed
Was that another jab at my clever puns
If it was, I assure you it was deserved
Sometimes you really know how to burn my buns
I see we are back to making bad jokes about food
Better than bad food that will give you the runs
That is certainly one way to kill the mood
You are a real COMMODEan with those lines
It’s about delivery and attitude
Perhaps but good jokes are like cheese and fine wines
Moldy oldies that few can appreciate
That’s us, I meant good jokes are like the divines
Holy men do like their wines but what’s so great
All good things are properly aged and profound
A witty pun fresh off the cuff is top rate
With just some practice and thought you can astound
I prefer a good adlib over scripted notes
Because your memory has yet to be found
Yours is no better, we have become old goats
Indeed, just a couple of old sons of guns
Our humors for which there are no antidotes
Speaking of, you hear the one about the puns?
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