Chapter 15
Alastor smells the smoke before he and Lilith ever even enter the hotel. At first, it doesn’t even pique his interest. Why should it? This is Hell, after all, and there’s always fires burning here and there. However, the pair of slightly singed and amusingly over-animated Morningstars panicking and ushering hotel guests away from the kitchen does alert him to the fat that this particular fire requires his attention.
Lilith reaches for her daughter to calm her from her flailing and shouting for guests ‘not to panic’, a task which she herself is obviously failing. “Charlie, dear, whatever is the matter?”
“Oh! Mom! You’re back! Uh….n nothing to worry about! Really, everything is fine! Just a small fire, but dad and I totally have it under control!” Lucifer was busy fussing over a fire extinguisher, of all things, while also visibly panicking and attempting to sound reassuring as he instructed others who were merely standing there watching, to remain calm.
Alastor rolled his eyes at the pair. Did these two idiots seriously forget they could use magic? With a quick flick of his hand Alastor banished the flames and most of the smoke. Lucifer noticed.
“Hmph, show off. I could have done that.”
“Then why didn’t you instead of playing around with this confounded device?” Alastor taps the fire extinguisher with his staff, then added, “which may or may not even work.”
“I would have if it became necessary.” Lucifer feels his fae heating up. Truthfully it just hadn’t even occurred to him in his state of panic, but he wasn’t about to let Alastor know that.
“Oh really? When? After letting half the hotel burn down?”
“Hey! I had everything under control!”
“If by ‘everything’ you mean flailing and shouting like a helpless imbecile, then oh yes, you absolutely had THAT covered.”
“Listen, Asshole! Charlie and I were doing just fine before you showed up and decided to show off! Weren’t we, Charlie?” Lucifer looked over at his daughter who was currently trying to catch her breath while being gently coaxed by Lilith to breath through her panic attack in and out slowly. He suddenly felt a sharp stab of guilt and was once again reminded of his failings as a father.
“Hmmm yes, it certainly does seem that way. I’m sure this is exactly how Charlie intended to spend the evening with her mother.”
“Alright, Alastor, that’s quite enough.” Lilith stepped in.
“Very well. I suppose you’re right. No use pointing out the obvious. I’ll go tend to what’s left of the kitchen and prepare a real dinner for everyone.” Alastor snapped his figures and the kitchen was as good as new again, more or less, with some additional personal features and décor, of course.
Lucifer felt like poofing away to hide in his room until the shame left him, but he had promised Charlie and Lilith they’d have dinner together. Now he just had to avoid messing anything else up. “Should we, uh, see about having our private family dinner at a nine restaurant? I can get us in anywhere you want to go.”
“What? Daaaad, Alastor just said he’d cook for EVERYONE! We should stay here. Mom, you really gotta try Alastor’s cooking! I think you’re going to love it! Sometimes it’s a little too spicy for me, but he always sets aside some less seasoned portions for those of us who can’t quite stomach his level of heat. But you like spicy food, right?”
“I do enjoy a good bit of heat to my food and this isn’t the first time you’ve raved about Alastor’s cooking. I listened to quite a few voice mails about how good of a meal he prepared and how I need to try it upon my return. I must say, I’m quite looking forward to it.” Lilith turned to Lucifer and tried to sound reassuring. “Besides, it would be rude to reject such an offer and just leave, don’t you think?”
“Oh, well…,” Lucifer sighed in defeat, “if you really want to try the busboy’s cooking, I guess it can’t be helped. Though, I don’t see what’s so great about it.” That was a lie if he ever told one. Alastor’s cooking was delicious! Even so, there was no need to admit it out loud. It would just go to Bambi’s head, and Lucifer wasn’t about to stroke that guy’s ego.
“How about we take some time now to talk, while Alastor is cooking, just the three of us? There is something I need to tell you both.”
“You’re not leaving again, are you, Mom?”
“No. At least, I don’t intend to. I would like to take some time to travel the rings and see what all has changed while I waws away, but that can wait. First, I need to explain my latest deal with Alastor and how it pertains to the two of you.”
Charlie and Lucifer simultaneously gasp and start shouting.
“Mom! You made another deal with Alastor?!”
“What do you mean ‘latest deal’?! Lily, please tell me you didn’t! You and Red Guy leave together for, what, an hour, and somehow in that time you go and make another deal with his?! Uhg! You see, Charlie, this is EXACTLY why I didn’t want to leave that dumb radio demon jerk alone with your mom!”
Actually, Charlie was beginning to think maybe her father’s concerns were justified. “Yeah Mom, don’t you ALREADY owe Alastor a favour?” Charlie knew all too well what that felt like and didn’t want to think about it.
Lilith rolled her eyes. “Calm down, both of you. Just have a seat and let me explain.”
Lilith relays the conversation she’d had with Alastor and Rosie to Charlie and Lucifer, including the details of her latest deal. Lucifer can’t help but sneer at the idea that he should need protection from anyone, let alone Alastor. “Lily, not that I don’t appreciate your concern for my wellbeing, but did you forget who I am? I don’t need protection, and even if I did, Alastor? Him? A Royal Guard? Might as well just cook Charlie and me up and hand us over to him. Ha! On second thought, no need for that I suppose, just give the guy a bib. I understand the cannibal likes his meat raw.”
“Lucifer!”
“Dad!”
Lucifer cringed. Okay, he may have gone a bit too far. He was pretty sure Alastor had no intention of ‘eating’ them, but he was still a cannibal and clearly interested in…something. Lilith had to know this was a dangerous idea, even if technically Alastor couldn’t hurt them. He sighed, “look, I’m not trying to shame anyone’s dietary preferences here, but you can’t honestly think a guy like him is trustworthy?”
“A guy like him? And what do you even know of him, besides that he’s a cannibal?” Lilith’s voice was stern and she looked at him the same way she had when he had judged sinners, their people.
“Yeah, Dad, in all the time you’ve been here, have you even tried to get to know him?”
Not Charlie too. “Okay okay, I didn’t really mean to insult him or anything. Actually, you’re right, I don’t know that much about him, and that alone should be cause for concern, right? I mean, we can’t just let a complete stranger have that much access and power. Plus, I do know that he’s super annoying.” That earned him more glares and he sighed again. “Fine. It’s not even really about him, okay. It’s just…well…I don’t NEED anyone to protect me…especially not him.”
“Dad, maybe mom is right. The whole Vox thing? I don’t know, maybe you should have a guard. I know Alastor isn’t your first choice, but he has been super helpful and supportive to me and with running this hotel and I just don’t think Vaggi and I could have done it without him so…”
Lilith decided to save her daughter from rambling, “I understand that your pride is an obstacle. It is, your sin, after all, but why are you so specifically against him?”
“Oh, you want to talk about pride? Have you met that smug walking talking Twizzler?! If I allow him to ‘protect me’,” Lucifer used air quotes, “he’ll never let me hear the end of it!”
“Well, that’s too bad. I’m afraid it’s not up to you. The deal is already in place. Now, speaking of deals, Charlie, would you mind inviting Alastor to join us for dinner? I believe he intends to eat with the rest of your friends and allow us some privacy, which is kind of him, but I do have something I wish to explain more thoroughly to you, and to him.”
“Oh, sure! I’ll go right no and check on things in the kitchen! Dad, please try not to provoke him.”
“ME?!” but it was too late to protest the accusation as Charlie had already run off to fetch the red jerk, a little too excitedly in Lucifer’s opinion.
Follow me on X/Twitter https://x.com/AlienAnatomyTC
Leave a Reply